8.28.2013

Vibrators: Treat Yo Self



I don't make any money from this blog by recommending products or anything like that (this is more like a time/money sucking hobby than a money maker), but I am going to recommend a product today.

Get yourself a vibrator.

I guess the password is "vibrator." This is real - you can read more HERE
They are female orgasm makers. I mean if I'm going to promote increased ladygasms in the sack, it just follows that I should be promoting vibrator use also. As I've said numerous times, finding our way around the web of confusion that is female sexuality in this culture is just plain complicated. Even the simple act of having an orgasm regularly in sexual situations with another person is beyond the grasp of many if not most of us (even though there is nothing particularly tricky about having an orgasm - at least not more tricky than it is for men). We ladies got dealt a raw deal when it comes to living in a world that caters to our orgasms. Our sexual journey is more of an uphill one, but man, at least we have vibrators. So, here's my humble advice and thoughts on these little jewels of femaledom.

1. Buy a good one, for god sake. The more sturdy and industrial it looks, the better. If you can plug it in or set it proudly on a charger by your nightstand, excellent. Those cute novelty ones will let you down. The batteries will have to be changed too often. They'll start to slow down after a few uses, or they'll just fall apart and die. You want robust vibe-ing when your clit calls, not some sad death pulses of a 10 year old broke-ass vibe.

2. If you're a woman on the go who likes a good quickie on the sly, then invest in a little, discreet, quiet battery operated one that can disguise itself somewhere in your purse or backpack. Still - buy a good one - that's an important part of being prepared - which, by the way, is a really important Girl Scout rule. You want to be able to make the most of your opportunities. There will be nothing more disappointing than your jank lipstick-vibe dying during your bathroom rendezvous with the hot Brazilian Olympic swimmer you happened upon. 

3. If you only really get off with a vibrator, don't fret. If the gods wanted you to use your fingers, they wouldn't have invented vibrators, am I right? Bottom line is you're getting off, and that's a very good thing. You best be stocking up on some good ones though, like I said before, you want them quality and you want them available when the time comes.

4. If you're more of a hands on person and you're afraid of the intensity of the vibe, I understand. Sticking a full blast vibe right on the clit first thing can be enough to make you jump out of your skin. A vibrator is a lovely thing though, and I recommend all ladies at least give it a whirl - for shits and giggles. You just gotta take it slow. Only touch the areas around the clit - anywhere on the vulva is pretty sensitive, so it's gonna feel good, and it'll get you pretty close. Be light in your touch. Use a low setting. Don't put the vibe on the clit till right before you're ready to blow. It might take a couple times to get the timing and pressure right, so keep at it. I guarantee it'll be worth it. (I don't actually guarantee it, but you know, I feel pretty strongly that most people would probably like it.)

5. If your partner doesn't like the idea of using a vibrator during your sexy couple time, talk with them and let them know that you're interested in trying it out. Maybe they're old fashioned, so you can give them a day or two to think on it and talk it out, but honestly, if they aren't into you adding more orgasmic pleasure into your sexual escapades, then fuck them. You should probably think heavily about dropping that zero - you can get a hero to replace if you want, but actually solo might be more fun.

Anyway, that's all I have in me at the moment. Go Treat Yo Self!


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